Life is fragile. The slightest change, one decision can alter everything. Your life can take a totally different direction in a matter of minutes. Usually, we don't know how the decisions we make each day will impact our paths until much later in the future. People come and go from our lives so frequently, and all we are left with are memories. We take those memories, both good and bad, and try to understand what it all means.
I have made a few big decisions in the past that I expected to take me down a certain path, and come to find out, I ended up on an alternative path that God planned out for me. We can only see the small scale of the picture. God has the big picture which is out of our hands.
During college, I chose to leave my current school and transfer to a school in my hometown. At the time, I thought I was making the right choice. Little did I know that I would start hanging out with the wrong crowd and become involved in several toxic romantic relationships. That one decision put me on a path that I never saw coming. However, I don't have regrets because failing is how we grow. If I wouldn't have experienced all those bad relationships, I wouldn't be the strong woman I am today.
In my 30s, I made a conscious decision to have sex with someone who was not committed to me. That decision led me to being a single mother. When I first found out I was pregnant and was going to be raising a child on my own, I was devastated. Being abandoned caused me so much anger and resentment. The depression I experienced was unreal. I didn't understand why God would put me in this situation. Three years later, I had an opportunity to move to my dream location near the ocean. This would not have been possible if I were still with my son's father. He would never leave his hometown to build a new life somewhere else. I am incredibly grateful that things didn't work out in Pittsburgh with my son's father. I thought that was what I wanted, but I would have been settling.
Since moving to the beach, I've experienced constant change. I chose to cut ties with my family. I chose to end relationships with certain friends who were no longer supporting me and lifting me up. I quit two jobs in a year's time. I met several new people, some of which were temporary friendships and some that turned into strong, lasting friendships. My point is all these decisions seem small at the time when you're making them, but they can lead you to places you never saw coming. And because life is fragile, I am holding onto the present moment with everything in me. I don't want to take my eyes off this chapter of my life where everything seems to make complete sense.
I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, it just takes a long time to find out the reason why. If all these events didn't take place in my life, I would not be where I am today. I would not have met the people here who I am so thankful to have in my corner. I am so happy to be standing here today in complete awe of how my life has turned out. God knows what we need. Don't ever doubt that.
- J. Lynn
